Last week, life was a featureless plain. It was me amongst this bland flatness. Mighty bleak. Mighty lonely, too, ’cause I’m a boring piece of shit. Sullen mope. Utter failure. Why even breathe? So fucking pointless. Frustration. And then on Thursday, while in work trying to coax these electrical boards out of the machine, I […]
Read more*** I’m laughing too hard to entitle
I amuse me. Whether I mean to or not, I do. I find myself so fucking funny that I can’t cope! I can’t be! I know exactly which buttons to push to get me going weak, and so I push ’em. I’ve got to! I can’t help it! I’m addicted! If I could find the […]
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Natwest, the helpful bank: “Oh, you want your money back? That’s easy! We can help! All you got to do is jump through this hoop. And this one. And now this one. And this one, too. We can’t forget this one, it’s our favourite. And this one. And…”
Back near the end of September, I purchased myself an 11-foot paddle-board. What I received was a 2-foot ladybird. I don’t really know what it is, but it ain’t 11-foot long that’s for certain. I e-mailed the company and they said they’d get back to me but didn’t. I Facebooked them and got told that […]
Read moreA weekend not visiting the parents
Now that I’m with car, the 3-hour drive to their respective homes almost promotes regular visits through ease alone. It’s a case now of jump in the car and go! No 5-hour train journey. No asking my father to pick me up and drop me home. I’m independent now, baby. But neither parent wanted me. […]
Read moreI now see
It’s the little things I now notice All the things I didn’t see Couldn’t see Didn’t want to Why would I? I wouldn’t have been me
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It’s almost been too long — it’s that time again! Let me hear a whoop whoop!
Well, the heat and Tuesday’s bad mood have conspired to bring about a vertigo migraine. Yippee! Nausea has my heart always. And in this spirit of romance, today I took my lover to the cinema. I would’ve preferred being reclined on the sofa. Actually, I would’ve preferred no migraine, but I can’t have everything. I […]
Read moreToday’s new and improved anger management technique was a success in that I didn’t get a migraine
I had to succumb to a broken spirit, but I didn’t get a migraine. WIN! (Kinda) I had to fall so far that I lost hope, fell into a routine — died inside. It’s a similar place to where you go when you’re a kid and your parents are having a blazing row. Withdraw. It’s just […]
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It’s vertigo migraine time! YAY! Woop woop! I’m so damn pleased
Well, this weeks vertigo migraine is fast taking up the whole week. If I get a say, it can go fuck itself. It can take its dizziness and nausea and shove it where the sun doesn’t shine. I have neither the time nor patience to put up with this crap. But put up with it I […]
Read moreA weekend after a road trip to Wales
Heading off to Wales for 3 days was full of purpose. It was my first proper long distance drive since buying Bertie. 190-odd miles to my father, 15 to my mother, 180-odd back. I loved every minute. Bertie’s oil warning light issue was the only, well, issue. It was my first chance to freely travel […]
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A long weekend that actually felt like a bank holiday
Unlike most other bank holidays that whizz by like as if they’re shorter than a regular weekend, this one took its sweet sweet time. It actually took its days as gorgeous, sunny days should; lazily. It all began on Friday after work. After popping to the allotment to do a spot of watering, I spent […]
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A weekend avoiding some wedding
I wouldn’t say I’m anti-Royal, I quite like them, really. They don’t bother me. It’s just that if Prince Harry got married to Meghan on a weekday, and this day was made into a Bank Holiday, then I’d be all other their celebrations. I’d be WOOP WOOP WEDDING!!!! (I am often inappropriate in church) But […]
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2 years on from ‘In lieu of care’
It has been 2 years since I was freed from The Southern Co-operative Funeralcare and their warped sense of compassion, and if it hadn’t been for Facebook’s ‘On this day’ reminder then I wouldn’t have even noticed — I think that’s progression right there.
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The looming prospect of driving — my test is a week today!!! 😱😱😱
This time next week I’ll either be a bona fide driver, with my green provisional being whisked off to the DVLA to be resprayed pink, or I’ll have failed on something stupid and looking to rebook my test. One or the other. It would make my life easier if I passed first time — well, […]
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It’s March 31st again
This date looms in the calendar. 11:20(ish) a.m.. 3 years ago today he left us when he should’ve been allowed to stay. He was such a wonderful man, and I’m not just saying this because I’m biased. He was a much better man than me. And 3 years on, it feels like it’s been barely […]
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My anger & I
I can be exceptionally subtle… not.
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If only I was different
If only I was different If I was someone else I know I’d be magnificent No bargain off the shelf I would surely be the envy Of everyone about And then I’d finally like me Love me without a doubt
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One whole year of weekends, the review
1 year, 52 weekends, most of which long forgotten.
My year review written 2 weeks late because it came around too quick and I wasn’t ready.
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Driving lesson 9 — turn in the road
Ah shit, I need to head the other way!!
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Today’s anger
This is written now that I’m calm
Read moreVirgin Media, their doghouse at their convenience
Day 1 was really just a waste of time. Rude staff, false promises — would Day 2 be any better?
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Anger, its management, its migrainous echo
Sometimes you get really rather annoyed. I mean REALLY rather annoyed. KABOOM! annoyed. And so you got to do something about it. Then you get a vertigo migraine.
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Who am I to me?
I am this to me
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The big 3-double-0 in blog posts!!!
This post right here is a personal triumph
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Working back in Fareham, this time in a factory
I’ve returned! I’m not necessarily a fan of Fareham
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I feel like at age…
I should’ve been…
(Life is a journey, the years are keepsakes, and fortunately there’s no baggage limit.)
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Please, Mister Postman! Deliver de letter the sooner de better
Letter to my mother, SENT!!
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A weekend mulling
Hmmm – ah eh, no…
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Mystery ‘signed for’ letter — SOLVED!!!
So I went to the post office
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Letter to write for my mental-wellbeing so I obsess & drive myself nuts = WRITTEN!!!
YES! It’s done! Oh my god! Oh my god! I know! (I don’t know why exactly I’m bowing)
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November 27th — the date that changed my mind
My mental health awareness day
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Letter to write for the sake of my mental-wellbeing so I obsess over it & drive myself nuts = ✔︎
AAARGH!!!
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Our mental well-being is a fragile thing
World Mental Health Day 2017
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Fuck it, I’ll sign up for Talking Change
Just not today.
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Firecracker temper — Tomos, why so angry?
ANGER: a strong feeling of annoyance, displeasure, or hostility There was a time when I kept my anger, disapproval, disgust private — always accommodating, assuaging to all — my thoughts my own, never rocked the boat; wouldn’t like to, me no like confrontation. Apologetic, quick to — any blame? Mine. This is because I’ve never liked my […]
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It’s been 1 year at Portsmouth Water! I know, right? Gone quick
This morning at 9am it officially became one year in Customer Service — Roxie and I shared little paper gifts and carried on as we’re now accustomed. We haven’t drowned and we haven’t had our P45s — WIN! I just want to say that I’m really grateful for this year. It’s not hard for me to recall the difficulty […]
Read moreWho I am these days now things are different
I am changed. It is an undeniable truth — totes altered, that’s me. You don’t lose close loved ones, get bullied by your manager in the funeral home you work, get forced to defend your grief to your employers, have a breakdown, spiral down, and come out the other side without changing a little. Impossible. I could […]
Read moreDark days
I have my dark days. They are not as dark as the days had once been but they aren’t light filled, aren’t clear and transparent — still thick fog in the dead of night; still lost in a place unknown. They are lonely days. I can’t voice how I feel so no-one can understand, can […]
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