I’ve given up not talking about it — inner ear / nausea update: Not vertigo. Vertigo’s amateur cousin, latest Dr says

After 5 weeks off I’ve managed 2 weeks (although it equates to only 7 actual days) in work with barely any issue. When I say ‘barely any issue’ I mean I haven’t been translucent and unable to walk. Except Friday. Friday was a bad day. But I lasted the whole day and only dry heaved twice. Last Thursday night, too. That wasn’t a good night. Nor was Saturday night, come to think of it — slightly worse than Friday. But other than them, no issue.

Also, I’ve discovered ascending and descending 2 stories doesn’t do me good. 1 floor’s alright, but 2 gets me dizzy and sickly. I haven’t tried a 3rd or above. I discovered this after a meeting on the 2nd floor the Wednesday before last and coming back down convinced me that I had to cancel this weekends trip to Paris. I was looking forward, but if I couldn’t manage 2 floors then I couldn’t guarantee 30,000 feet.

So I kept my holiday, haven’t gone to Paris, and been to the doctors for the 7th time.

Spin & Chunder

The nausea and dizziness is worse in the morning and also constant. The whole time I’m up and awake I’m aware of it. Sometimes the nausea sits by my tonsils, other times its just a grumble. The dizziness is just a sway — a perpetual sway. Back and forth, left to right, every whichever.

Occasionally, like last Thursday night and Saturday night, the nausea can get so bad that the dizziness doesn’t even get a look in and tears fall. It eventually passes. Takes about 5 / 10 minutes. I’m fine.

With the mornings, it’s pot luck — most mornings are bad but Friday was particularly special. As I was doing my teeth I hit the back of my throat with my toothbrush and that got the vomit coming and coming and coming. I didn’t settle myself because I was running late for work, so that’s how the day got shot.

I will admit that I was out drinking Saturday night, and I’d one lonesome vodka lemonade on Thursday night — it was my best mate’s birthday and I had a drink because and wanted to, shoot me.

Some have said that I shouldn’t have but I’ll say it again: Cancel your life for 7 weeks, live it, and then come back to me. Oh, and have what I got ongoing. Coming up in here — the nerve of them.

After my blood test came back ‘no action required’ the doctor said that if things didn’t improve then I should get referred to a specialist.

Since I was meant to be jetting to Paris yesterday afternoon I spent the morning at the walk-in clinic — I got to wait around for hours, similar to an airport.

Yesterday’s doctor was Dr Garland, and he turns out to be my actual GP — I thought my GP was the doctor with the 80s quiff, and it’s a shame it isn’t. I love her quiff, it’s amazing.

To quickly gloss over a half hour visit, I don’t have vertigo. I do have vertigo but not vertigo proper. I also don’t have Labyrinthitis, Ménière’s disease, or some acronym he kept blurting out and saying I didn’t have. BDSM? I don’t think that’s right. BDPS? It started with a B.

Anyway, I don’t have that. Dr Garland thinks I have another acronym that’s similar to the first but has a different last letter.

I got given some information on Vestibular Neuritis. Actually, Vestibular Neuritis and Labyrinthitis, but he told me to ignore the latter, and this acronym is similar to the former. So it’s not this.

Ah, good.

At least it’s all clear.

Dr visit #7

Dr Garland has an abrupt bedside manner — it takes you a little moment to get used to it before you realise his abruptness isn’t rude.

He made mention of all the 5 doctors I’d seen and focused on the 1 I’d seen twice, and he dismissed the blood test as being futile.

Basically, and I got this from what he wasn’t saying, one idiot followed another, and the last was the biggest of them all. Together they’d escalated what I had into that first acronym without ruling out the second.

Silly doctors.

There are, apparently, 3 tests that should’ve been done:

  1. Sitting down and following his fast moving finger from left to right with my eyes without moving my head. And then up and down.
  2. Standing up and being stared at, and then following his finger.
  3. Lying down one way and focusing on a point on the wall (once he’s moved my head quickly from centre). And then repeating, other side.

Also, there’s blood pressure (sitting and standing), staring into my eyes some more, and looking into my ears.

I’d only ever had test 1 once, and that didn’t have up and down.

I’ve had the ear probe and the blood pressure (sitting) 3 times before.

Dr Garland said that his observations made going to see a specialist a waste of time because I don’t have vertigo. I do but I don’t.

I have vertigo’s amateur cousin

When I lie down in bed the nausea and dizziness goes away, and if I turn from one side to the other I suffer no ill effects — because of this, I don’t have vertigo.

I have vertigo’s amateur cousin.

If this is ‘amateur’ I wouldn’t want professional vertigo.

What I’ve got isn’t affecting the fluid in my ears, it’s affecting the vestibular nerve — it’s a form of migraine, among other causes; some scarier than others.

He emphasised weeks for it to go away.

More weeks — great.

Moving forward

It could be lifestyle.

My eating has never fully recovered since being in lieu of care and having a breakdown December 2015.

It could be stress.

I wouldn’t consider myself stressed but then you can grow accustomed to stress and not recognise it.

It could be …

The mornings, I will have to take them as they come. If I have a repeat of Friday then I will be required to settle myself completely before even contemplating trying to start my day again.

Should the nausea debilitate to the point of tears again then I will need a tissue. It passes, eventually.

Things aren’t as bad as they were. I have returned to work and I can manage it. True, I’m off now but that’s holiday and not sickness. I figured I’d get the doctor in and rebuild a bit of my life.

It takes time to right itself.

It’s had 7 weeks.

If this ruins my birthday — I’m going to one of those adventure play zone places, with the slides and ball pools — then I’m going back to Dr Garland and I’ma matching his abrupt manner and telling him I’m getting referred.

It’s got one final month.

Not gone, referred.

[I reserve the right to hasten this deadline.]

So yeah, vertigo’s amateur cousin — like vertigo but not

Why? Why do I always have to be different?

Because I’m loveable this way.